okay, so just like, never mind.

This dating this sort of sucks. Is that true? Do I really mean that? Well, sort of. I mean, it’s tough meeting people and it’s tough reading people and there’s all these rules involved and protocol and etiquette and all that happy horse shit. It’s sort of irritating. Not to mention this whole internet thing that’s really bizarre to me. Meeting people’s consciousnesses disembodied from the whole of the person only to be surprised by the person in the flesh. It’s all very weird. I don’t know what to make of it.

Things I’ve learned about dating women from the internet:

  • You can really only email someone back and forth maybe a half dozen times. Any more and the person on the other end becomes larger than life. Your expectations will exceed reality.
  • Telephone calls prior to the first date aren’t necessarily a good thing. There’s not much of a difference between a disembodied consciousness communicating via email and a disembodied consciousness communicating via telephone wires.
  • First dates, for some reason, are always over coffee. Which makes them feel more like job interviews than dates.
  • Most importantly, I don’t really have time to date right now anyway. What the hell am I doing?

I mean really. Look at my last Rant. And the list of things I get to do seems to grow by leaps and bounds every day. Which is wonderful. Because all these things are truly meaningful in my life. The job and the web design and the comp exams and the paper proposals and the possibility of Tokyo in September and camps over the summer. I love it all and wouldn’t have it any other way.

Yesterday I about had a heart attack because the copier in our office wouldn’t work. And it was stressing me out mostly because I care. Not because “it’s my job” and I have to care or the Man won’t give me a paycheck. But because I legitimately care about what happens in that office. My God. I like my job.

The other day, I was reading a book called Discourse and the Construction of Society. And I liked it so much I emailed a friend of mine to recommend it to him because I thought he’d like it, too. Which just goes to show how much I get off on being a crazy academic guy who reads too much.

And here I am on a Wednesday afternoon writing code. I should be out looking for the love of my life.

No. Wait. Scratch that. She’ll find me. We’ll meet if it’s meant to be. Especially if I’m doing what I love doing the most.