at work

Wow. This feels weird. I can’t figure it out. I feel completely out of place here. I’m sitting at my desk. I’m in Berkeley. This is what I do. This is my life. It’s the life I was leading two weeks ago, but now it feels foreign. Different. Not at all mine. How did this happen?

Did camp change me that much? I cant say for certain. There’s a good possibility that I’m just tired. That I haven’t fully recovered from Camp Time. That my mind and body still expect to be surrounded by screaming fourteen year olds. And there’s a part of me that’s resistant to getting back to the grindstone. A part of me that doesn’t want to face the truth that I still have a lot of work to do here in the office and that the new semester is starting next week and I’ll be heading off to Japan in the next couple of weeks. That all those things that were on my list to do are still there, minus one: camp. But just one.

I need to get back into it. It’s sort of like jet lag. You just need to get on local time.

But is this where I want to be?

I need to stop worrying about this. After all, when I’m tired, I’m not always good at thinking clearly.

I’ll come back to this. Maybe I should go for a walk. Get some coffee. Start over again. The sun’s coming out. And it’s still summer. And I’ve got time.