A friend of mine had the following Facebook status earlier today: “dizzy from rolling with the punches” (I’m paraphrasing here to protect the innocent.)
I am feeling this way. A lot. The other shoe seems to have dropped. There is too much in me right now and I don’t know where to begin. I’m listening to “Casimir Pulaski Day” by Sufjan Stevens and it always reminds me of my dog. So. The word today should be melancholy.
The economy is hitting closer to home. A friend was recently diagnosed with cancer. A few months ago, I felt like things in the world couldn’t get much worse, but, all at once, it felt a lot like 1989, crappy economy, no one caring about the environment, a Bush in the White House. A few months ago, it felt like, yeah, things are a little nutty, but they’ve always been nutty. A nuttiness you could set your watch to. Now? Hell, who knows.
And then, at the same time, I am reminded of all the beautiful things in the world. I am reminded that I’ve still got this job, the daily grind, which, grinding as it might feel at times, is, nevertheless, an extension of my practice, that all I really do around here is talk about the Buddha.
I am reminded of the love and support that surrounds me. I am bowing in deep gratitude for the Dharma, for my own sangha, my own sangha of rag-tag leftists and artists and dreamers. And the intolerably cute cat waiting for us at home.
So I’m rolling with the punches. And I’m going to turn off the computer for the weekend and be with the people I love and celebrate hanamatsuri and engage this life, dizzy or not.
Be good out there.